Our Wild Weekend

Our weekend was wild. And hilarious. And a true mama defining moment for me.

Saturday was our dear friends Amy + Spencer’s wedding. It was being held in the country, outside of hubs’ hometown of Stratford. I was super excited to dance, enjoy a glass of wine, and celebrate these two lovebirds.

Leading up to the wedding, I had been brutally battling between the idea of leaving George with family while hubs and I enjoyed the night together. I was so torn. I cried. A lot. I wanted to enjoy a date night with my husband (it’s been forever!) but I didn’t feel ready to leave my little bestie yet. I felt pressured to be ‘okay’ with leaving him and that if other mamas could do it, why couldn’t I? I bullied myself into being ‘okay’ with it but it hurt my heart too much. It just wasn’t right. I hadn’t been away from GBB at all; it was all too much for me. Looking back at last week, I am sad I was so hard on myself!

So, hubs and I decided we were going to bring our sweet little dude and I was thrilled. I became excited and couldn’t wait to show him off!

Hubs hung out with George while I left to go buy him a sweet new outfit. Yes, I had thirty minutes to myself. It was weird. And lovely. I rushed around the mall feeling like I had lost a limb and I was only minutes away from breaking down into sobs or waking up from a dream. It was strangely liberating. I did get a text from hubs that little man was super overtired + he needed his mommy…sooo I ran to my car (actually!) and drove home in record time. And then it took me a lifetime to parallel park our damn car…obviously.

Anyway. George now had a sweet new outfit for the wedding + a few fun Halloween pieces (because, duh!) and I was so excited.

We visited + stayed with my MIL (which was lovely!), got all dressed up, and we ventured to the wedding. If you follow me on IG (@holbowman), you’ll see I even did my hair! Woo!

The weather was rainy (and not a few drops here and there, but full-out raining), cold, windy, and very moody. Exactly the fall weather that makes me want to curl up and watch a movie or read a new book; not ideal wedding weather. But it was an outdoor wedding in a stunning timber-log barn/shop and oh my goodness, the venue was gorgeous. Fairy lights, flowers, and draped curtains galore. The bride and groom looked so happy and in-love, it was perfect. I wish I took more photos!

As soon as the ceremony was over, I made my way to our car to warm up and feed George. The music was getting louder and the party was just getting started. Hubs and I set GBB up in the house (the groom’s parents home on the wedding property!) and got all geared up for a warm snuggle and sleep. Turns out baby monitors only reach so far (ha!)…and there was no way I could bring George back into the dance party so, I sat in the basement and watched television while my sweet bubs nursed and slept happily. For the whole wedding.

Initially, I was really really upset. Super disappointed. I was alone watching bad tv (Cops! Ugh!) and suffering serious fomo (fear of missing out)/actually missing out on a good dance party + celebration with my friends. I even shed a few tears.

In that moment, I looked down at my little dude who was peacefully sleeping and who was so happy + warm, and I realized that I was in fact doing the right thing. It was my mama defining moment; ah, my life has changed. And I was okay with it. George is my priority and if that meant I was to sit alone in a cozy basement watching bad television and sipping on a beer in a mason jar than so be it.

What a wild wild weekend! Hashtag, mom life.

XO

Next weekend, we’re taking a little road trip to Ottawa to visit with my family and celebrate Thanksgiving! I wonder how that’s going to turn out… ha!